The 7:30 Am Mammogram

I have a horrible fixation with having the first appointment of the morning. I hate the idea of being behind whatever could possibly go wrong during the day. A previous appointment who is late. The doctor (or whoever the appointment is with) having a bad sandwich... whatever could affect the course of one's day.... I don't want it to affect mine. So if the mammogram office tells me that there is a 7:30 AM appointment, I am taking it.

Yes. I am crazy.

First, I didn't sleep well not wanting to miss my appointment and worried that I would not wake up with the 6am alarm (as I had to be there at 7)  so I was cranky and tired. Second, It was for a mammogram, so I had high anxiety. Third, I hadn't had a mammogram in 4 years because the hospital messed up my bill the last time, and it took 3 years to straighten it out, I didn't want to deal with them again.   Also, they scared me to death and inconvenienced me thinking something was wrong for the doctor to decide it was nothing. Oh, I almost caused a car accident on the way... did I say anxiety?

So the first person I deal with is the account person. She doesn't want to be up at that hour either.... and if I remember correctly, she is the same person who did my billing last time. I ask to pay my copay right away, and in a very nasty tone she says she can't because she does not know how much my insurance will cover or not (every other doctor can estimate this though).  I tell her why, because of the problem with the last time, and she gets offensive, and says "I don't know what you are talking about. That did not happen."  So, I'm like whatever, she's like whatever, so whatever.  She walked me to the back and gave me brief instructions, nothing like the gentle instructions I heard her give every other person so... forget her.  Unlike last time, I was not instructed that I could have a refreshment, nothing... she spoke to me like I was a dog. I wanted to cut her, but I did not. She lived.

Thank goodness, the technician was wonderful. She played a weird game of twister with my body, but she was encouraging and pleasant.... and handsy... but that was her job. Unlike the last time, halfway through, she did not fall silent and break eye contact.  I did not leave with more anxiety. Whether I have to go back again for more tests like last time, I am not worried about it... so, good.  That is over, at least for now.

The best thing about that appointment is I was back home by 8:30.... and I took a mid-day nap.

Next time, OBGYN.

My fitbit and me

I got a FitBit for my 49th birthday. I like it. My husband got the newest model which tracks heart rate... and it is sleek and looks really nice, especially with the new rose-gold band I got for it as the original one was bordering on too small. Perhaps it will fit in a couple months.

 I have been tracking my steps wallked, daily calories expended, and my food intake through the handy-dandy iphone app. This is making me aware of the things I mindlessly put in my mouth, and in the long-run, I believe it will help me lose weight.  I want to want to lose 2 pounds a week on average this next year so I will be in good shape by my 50th birthday because I may be knocking of 50's door right now, but next year I am kicking it in.  Wish me luck.

If black women are the most educated group, then we can fix poor education rates in black children

If, as they say, that black women are the most educated group, then in 1 generation, black children should naturally become the most educated group, changing the stereotypes about what we can accomplish academically.

When we know better, we do better.

They're not sticking me and they're not cutting me.

I went to the orthopedist today... that's the doctor who takes care of spine and joints. My primary care doctor sent me there a couple months ago. Last time I went the doctor said the problem was not weight related, which is strange because they all say it is weight related. He said that physical therapy would help the problem which he felt was caused in my back... but affecting my leg.

I went back to day for follow up and met with a new doctor. The previous doctor was no longer there. I actually did not see the doctor, but the physicians assistant.  He didn't touch me. He just said that it was time for an MRI and possible injection and then maybe surgery.  I was like... excuse me?  You're not sticking me and you're not cutting me. My leg numbness is getting better and I just want you to address the fact that physical therapy is focusing on a quadrant of my back, and now causing the rest of that side pain... the whole right side to the neck needs addressing.

He was quite rude. When I repeated myself he said "I heard you the first time", but then he was repeating himself about "this is what we do... surgery"... well, dammit... I'm gonna finish up another month of physical therapy, and lost weight because last time I lost weight, this problem went away.

They tell us not to self diagnose, but when a therapy is working and they want to jump ahead, then why should we trust them?